英语写作修改:The World Population Explosion - 世界人口爆炸

原文:

human race has experienced a consistent increase in population since the beginning of its history. famine and disease have done little to offset this steady increase. too many people are added annually to the population of the world. so both the causes of population increase and the results of having more people are worth careful study.

修改:

The human race has seen its population expanding ever since the beginning. Famine and diseases have done little to offset this growth. Now excessive numbers of people are added to the existing population every year. The causes and the impact of this expansion should be carefully studied.

说明:

A consistent increase不很确切,其中也有停滞和倒退。Expansion, increase, growth,用词多样化。

原文:

culture evolution is the major factor responsible for population increase. early in human development,people invented tools to hunt animals. later they built shelters to protect themselves. step by step,they made life easier. as a result,fewer died from natural forces,such as harsh climate and disease.

修改:

Technological and economic evolution is the major factor responsible for population growth. Early in human development, people invented tools to hunt animals. Later, they built shelters to protect themselves. Step by step, they made life easier for themselves. As a result, fewer human beings died from natural forces such as harsh climate and illnesses.

说明:

人口增长的主要原因是文化发展还是技术和经济发展?除非你说这里的文化culture是指文明civilization。

原文:

in the past,when population grew,there was unexplored territory to inhabit. but now,almost all the habitable land has been explored.  the world‘s population may reach 8.7 billion in 2033. it is clear that world population is a serious issue that needs careful attention. human beings are unique to solve problems through cultural evolution. facing the world population explosion in the near future. we must carry out the birth control program in order to save the mankind and save the world.

修改:

In the past, when population grew, human beings can migrate to unexplored and uninhabited territories. Now there is no more such virgin lands. With the prediction that the world’s population will reach 8.7 billion in 2033, this has clearly becoming a serious issue that deserves our attention. Human beings are unique that they can solve their problems through cultural development, so, facing the rapidly approaching world population explosion, we must take actions to save mankind and save the world.

说明:

There was explored territory to inhabit – human being could migrated to unexplored and inhabited territories,有动作,有动感。With the prediction that …, it is clear …,把句子串联起来。Birth control是具体行为,避孕,你跟你老婆那点子事儿。Population control,控制人口,是政策。

(原文作者:不详;修改评论:大家学 DJXUE.COM)